Challenge Your Limits

It Gets Better!

No matter who you are, there is at least one person you can think of that has bullied you. Bullying comes in many different forms and it doesn’t just happen to the “weird” kids or kids that don’t fit in. Bullying usually happens to those who are the most vulnerable and quiet. Besides telling you it does get better, I can say the most important concept to battle bullying is being vocal. I live by the concept that the personal is political and that sharing your story can have such an impact on not only your life but the lives of others. The It Gets Better Project is a project that was created to show young LGBT teens that it does get better. Dan Savage created this project when an outstanding number of young teens were being bullied and harassed in schools, and after many young teens were taking their own life as a result. This project is a way for people to share their own personal stories and to be vocal about bullying and show young teens that it does get better. This movement has had much support from several organizations, media personalities, and even the President. I’m creating this blog to show support for the It Gets Better Project and to hopefully reach out and inspire anyone who might be going through a struggle right now. I will also be making a video to submit to the It Gets Better Project. For more information visit: http://www.itgetsbetter.org/

                Ever since I was little I was told I was different. In elementary school I dressed in boy clothes, wore my hair in a ponytail, played sports with boys, and had crushes on girls. As a 22-year-old woman, I still get told that I am different. I am openly gay, have short hair which is half shaved, and can either wear six inch stilettos or high top Nikes. You could say I’m into fashion and usually wear whatever I feel like wearing that day, which I usually stand out because I like to take risks. Sometimes I stick out like a sore thumb and being openly gay usually makes me stick out even more. Before I came out, I tried to conform to society in any way possible. I was your typical all-American girl with long blonde hair, blue eyes, boyfriend after boyfriend, and tried to dress like everyone else. I used to want to fit into society so bad because I hated feeling different. I have come such long way since 2-3 years ago when I first started coming out to people. I have even come a long way since coming out to everyone 3 months ago. I would be lying if I said that I still don’t get stares or I still don’t hear about people talking behind my back, but I am now this confident young woman. I am on a mission to share my story and my struggles with LGBT youth who don’t have a voice or don’t have the support I have. My secret is simply confidence. Ever since I’ve come out, I have gained so much confidence. I am very open and very vocal about LGBT rights and about my own personal sexuality. I don’t hide who I am, I dress however I feel, and I still do everything that a heterosexual person does. I don’t get afraid to go places I know aren’t accepting and I’m not afraid to be around people who do not accept me. I went from being scared to death to be different, to wanting to be different. No one person in this world is “normal.” We all have our differences, but these differences are what make each one of us beautiful. I believe that if everyone took time to sit down and get to know someone who we think is different than us, we would either realize similarities or learn from their differences. I want to challenge you, either as a person of the LGBT community or a person of any other community, whether you have been bullied or have been the one who has done the bullying. I want you to try and find one person every single day that is different than you, either in a lot of ways or in just one way, who is the quiet kid sitting in the back of the class or the one who dresses a little unusual, the one with a lot of friends or no friends. I then want you to talk to them, even if it’s just a hello or a full on conversation. You wouldn’t believe what an impact you could make on someone’s day or even someone’s life by doing something so small and simple. You might think someone is different or weird, but you have no idea what they are going home to at the end of the day. You don’t know if they are going home to parents that abuse them, home to a mother that is hooked on drugs, a family that is rich but pays no attention to their kids, a family who is un-accepting of them in some way, or home to cause self harm to themselves because they just don’t feel good enough. If you are a person with a voice and with support, whether you are in the LGBT community or not, I strongly urge you to be the voice for these young people who can’t have a voice yet. Because IT DOES GET BETTER, for everyone. The struggles you go through today, makes the person who you will be tomorrow. Just know that you are beautiful and that being different is a good thing. Being different allows you to stand out and get your voice heard. Self harm and violence is never the answer to feeling different or feeling alone because you are NEVER alone. You wouldn’t believe how many people out there feel just like you!

            It is important that LGBT students know their rights and protections in schools and to not feel helpless and alone when bullying occurs. Remember these protections are the LAW and schools legally have to follow these protections. For a list of your rights and protections visit: http://www.aclu.org/lgbt-rights_hiv-aids/know-your-rights-quick-guide-lgbt-high-school-students

            If you are being bullied or harassed in or out of school, speak up! Don’t be afraid to tell someone. Having close friends to tell can help, but they cannot handle a bullying situation the right way and could make things worse. If you don’t feel comfortable telling a school faculty member or a family member, please visit: https://www.aclu.org/lgbt-rights_hiv-aids/get-help-anti-lgbt-discrimination-your-school